When I visited Surbiton, the so-called most boring place to live, for the first time, I decided to check out something a little different: the worst-rated spot to eat.
According to Google, the worst-rated place to eat in the area is a small burger joint called Hot Rod Burger, on 69 Surbiton Road, sitting at just 3.2 stars.
As a bleeding-heart optimist when it comes to food and life in general, I genuinely hoped this would be one of those misunderstood gems.
One of those “rough around the edges” places, but great if you open your eyes.
But if I’m being honest, I didn’t have a good time.
I arrived shortly after the place had opened for the day.
You’d expect things to be clean and prepped, ready for a new run of customers, but that wasn’t the case.
The tables were already dirty: sticky with leftover seasonings and what looked like dried-up rice grains.
It didn’t seem like anyone had even eaten before me that day, which made it all the more off-putting.
I decided to keep my order simple: chicken nuggets, chips, and a drink.
Basic comfort food and hard to get wrong.
To the kitchen’s credit, the food arrived quickly, within about seven minutes.
But that’s where the positives mostly end.
The man who served me didn’t ask if I wanted salt or vinegar on the chips, didn’t give me any sauce, and forgot to include the drink I’d paid for.
I was the only one there at the time, so I’m not sure what the excuse was.
I had to ask for the drink separately, and when I later requested sauce, I was handed a tiny squirt on the side of the chips – barely enough for a couple of chips.
As I sat down to eat, I noticed the same man wearing open-toed sandals in the kitchen area, something that immediately raised hygiene concerns.
On top of that, he was eating his own meal in the kitchen while watching something loudly on his phone.
I’m not sure what the video was, but the sound carried into the eating area.
It was hard to feel at ease, and the food itself was nothing to write home about.
The nuggets had no crunch at all.
Biting into them felt more like eating something boiled than fried.
They were soft, bland, and weirdly spongy.
The chips didn’t fare much better.
They tasted slightly undercooked and had that pale, limp texture that makes you wonder if they needed another minute in the fryer.
The whole meal lacked anything close to flavour or care.
It wasn’t terrible, but it was far from enjoyable.
For £6, I wasn’t expecting gourmet, but I was expecting at least a bit of effort.
A clean table, some customer focus, and food that felt fresh rather than thrown together.
I genuinely wanted this to be one of those places that’s better than its rating and misunderstood online.
But that wasn’t the case.
If anything, I left feeling like the 3.2-star average was accurate.
If I’d taken the food as a takeaway, I still don’t think I would’ve enjoyed it.
This wasn’t one of those cosy, scruffy places with hidden charm.
It was the kind of meal you finish out of hunger, not enjoyment.
This experience was underwhelming from start to finish.
Would I go back? No. Not even for £6.
I called Hot Rod Burger to give them a chance to comment, and they said: “It’s a good burger shop, a nice and very cheap one in the area.”
Hot Rod Burger did not provide further comment.
